It is the birthday blues.

okays, so we've reached the big 2. that means no more excuses for doing stupid things and people expect you to be more sensible and mature, yada yada. that sucks :(

I've been dreading birthdays for the past few years now. because i look back on the past year and see that my life nor I have nowhere improved from where I had been since my last birthday. And yes, the birthday wishes NEVER come true so what's the point. I'd imagined how my life would be when i'm older (which is like, now) and the reality doesn't even come close to how I wanna be. In fact, I'm starting to think that things have gotten worse. Does that motivate me to go out and DO SOMETHING?!! ...maybe.

Oh wells, before i sink into depression, I've realised a couple things this birthday. the company is more important than the activity! I find myself thinking that even though I can't seem to think of anything to do for my birthday, it was ok, as long as my friends could make it, even though it's just about sitting down and talking and doing nothing. (the other point here however, no one was free to do anything) seems like it is true that as you get older you can only lose close friends instead of gaining more.

On a happier note, hahahahahaha, I have once again confirmed that Mike Shinoda is the man of my dreams. even though he is a whole ten years older than me. and is married.




hmm i can't play in on my own com :(
but here's the link: Bleed It Out