ok lets look at aome things about the funeral and after that you never knew about, ok maybe just me.
daughters-in-law hold a higher/closer rank to the deceased than daughters. They have this different tag thing to pin for everyone according to your relation. even the children of the son of the deceased are different from the children of the daughters.
Insects are supposed to be a good sign around funerals. We had a bee hive around on the first day and on Thursday, a huge army of this flying thing ( ok I had no idea what bug it was) was just flying and resting around lah. So I guess its good, unless the information is inaccurate.
Im sure you've heard of this saying that if a cat jumps over the coffin, the deceased might actually wake up? yup. Imagine a black cat lurking in the surroundings on all the days of the funeral. I kept eyeing the cat suspiciously, thinking that any moment it might run into the parlour.
the immediate relatives of the deceased are supposed to sleep beside the coffin everynight during the funeral. but we didn't do that. We did sleep over on the last night, but not right beside the coffin.
you know those comforter/blanket thingys associations give with words on them for the funeral? In the past, you're supposed to bring them home after the funeral, take off the letterings and actually use them.
when praying to the deceased, you're supposed to bow 4 times. no idea why.
apparantly, a funeral is really good time for the family to bond. My eldest uncle, the eldest brother of the 7 siblings, told stories of their childhood. And i played quite as lot of 'dai ti' aka big two with my elder cousins.
It is also a good time to figure out your family tree accurately. you know, with so much free time and the rank tags thingys on everyone.
Orbituries actually help. Some man and his daughter whom no one knew came on the second day. Saying he saw the orbituary and came because he had the same surname. haha, he said that since its so so rare, he had to come see if we were all related or not. I don't think they managed to link anyone but still, cool!
the part where you walk slowly behind the van which is carrying the coffin, is done without shoes. just socks.
Mandai is currently the only crematerioum now. After the last rites are performed(somewhere that looks like lt4 and is as cold as it is), everyone is brought into another big room where there is a huge glass wall. Outside you see quite a long empty walkway, then another wall. Then after a long long while, some automated thing brings the coffin from beneath the room we were in and 'drags' it slowly along the looong walkway, allowing time for family memebers to cry their eyes out, then doors open from the wall on the other end and the coffin finally goes into the incinerater. Like my brother said: 'So drama,"
Ashes are collected the next day, and actually they are not ashes! Its all broken bones. They hand it over to you in some lousy tupperware plastic case (wow, such respect) then you're supposed to store them in an urn yourself. The bones of the skull go in last, so they are taken out and put somewhere first. Then, family members take turns to each take a bone and put it into the urn. The dude working there then puts in the rest of it. As the urn is obviously too small to fit all the bones(plus the skull hasn't gone in yet), the dude then uses a metal rod thing to crush all the bones that is inside the urn! A full urn becomes on that is less than half full. It sounded like yourself crunching on cereal. The skull goes in and
crush, crush, crush someore
as they also have to fit in some sort of cloth. To end it all off, the stupid lid is sealed off with scotch-tape. My gosh! Scotch-tape?! I have never been more disgusted.
My grandfather was finally put in Chua Chu Kang columbarium. So basically, we've been to all 3 of such places in Singapore. Mt. Vernon was where the funeral was but the area is going to be developed so you can't incinerate or put the ashes there. Mandai to incinerate, but the remaining slots there are either reserved for those relocating from Mt Vernon or the slots are in inconvinient places. Chua Chu Kang to put the ashes, finally.
