Emotional Autonomy

right now I'm just getting annoyed reading my friend's boyfriend's email, what with all that U instead of you, and the haha...lol.... whatnots. urgh. so anyhow, we left the country for a day today. didn't matter if it was like just twenty steps away from Singapore soil, I just had to get out. it was funn. We bought only a handful of crapp but who cares. And we were throwing out random psych facts along the way like a bunch of nerds. COOL psych nerds. Shazzy was wearing jcrc shirt somemore. very cool.

after all these years of complaining about how my parents can't seem to let go of me and how I have no independence, the past couple weeks I've noticed that I'm allowed to leave the nest and fly like a penguin. My mum doesn't even care about me not being home anymore, just as long as my necklaces and earrings are back home for her to borrow. Plus, I came home yesterday to find my room ransacked. for necklaces apparently. well done. when I said I'm going jb with a friend, all that was said was to carry a bag with a tiny opening (which doesn't make sense because I really don't know how that's going to save me if I do get robbed). when I came home last night, all I did was help my brother with his intern work and then sit in the room with my mum as she parades the many outifts she was deciding between to wear for her company dinner. well well looks like this baby of the family has become slave of the world. this freedom is quite awesomo yet a bit..sudden. Yet I still don't know how I'm going to tell them that I'm joining DP and Chingay this year and how I'd be stuck in hall for all of december once again. how!

It's amusing how my room's being lent out like a pair of old bowling shoes.
hmm. I wanna go bowling. and the arcade.

For the cheena at heart, for Yijun and all the other psychology majors (heard this on the A2 bus!), for c3, for YOU, not for the potato heads :D



And congrats to sixology!

Alexia, Agraphia, Anomia, Atonia, Agnosia, Ataxia, Aphasia, Apraxia


wha, like naming my future daughters.


3 more days! :)

all that I have,
is for you to take.

tonight's some pretty awesome time spent not studying.

Take a Stand.




























I don't know what this article was doing in Banter (which is supposed to be all about stupid funny stuff) but its really an inspiration!

At the 1968 Olympics in Mexico City, Tommie Smith and his teammate John Carlos came in first and third, respectively, in the 200-meter dash. As they received their medals, each man raised a black-gloved fist, creating an image that will always stand as an iconic representation of the complicated conflations of race, politics, and sports. Intriguingly, it was the third man on the podium, a Caucasian athlete named Peter Norman, who suggested that Smith and Carlos share the black gloves seen in their salute, after Carlos forgot his pair. It is why Smith raised his right fist and Carlos raised his left fist. Norman, a white Australian, donned a badge on the podium in support of their cause, the Olympic Project for Human Rights.Asked about his support of Smith and Carlos' cause by the world's press, Norman said he opposed his country's government's White Australia policy.

Australia's Olympic authorities reprimanded him and the Australian media ostracised him. Despite Norman running qualifying times for both the 100m and 200m during 1971/72 the Australian Olympic track team did not send him, or any other sprinters, to the 1972 Summer Olympics in Munich, the first ever modern Olympics where no Australian sprinters participated.After 1968 he played 67 games for West Brunswick between 1972 and 1977 before coaching an under 19 team in 1978. Norman kept running, but contracted gangrene in 1985 after tearing his Achilles Tendon during a training session, which nearly led to his leg being amputated. Depression and heavy drinking followed.

Norman was overlooked by Australian organising authorities as being involved in any way with the 2000 Summer Olympics held in Sydney; he was however eventually part of the event after being invited by the Americans when they heard that his own country had omitted to do so. On October 17, 2003 San Jose State University unveiled a statue commemorating the 1968 Olympic protest; Norman was not included as part of the statue itself - his empty podium spot intended for others viewing the statue to "take a stand" - but was invited to deliver a speech at the ceremony.

Norman died of a heart attack on October 3, 2006 in Melbourne, Australia at the age of 64. US Track and Field Federation proclaimed October 9, 2006, the date of his funeral, as Peter Norman Day.

(Contributions by Wiki!)
Get the detailed article from me! I'd bet you will get goosebumps after reading it.

Okay back to the books!

Stella, you're killing me.











hmm that photo does have a calming effect on me so hello, here's another one! exams are coming people, time to construct you list of things to do after the exams because there IS a light at the end of this tunnel! Everytime the exams come around I get this fear that everyone's moving on without me. Because I lock myself in my room and don't get off my ass (except to pee) for two whole weeks and the rest of the world do the whole studying together at the library/coffee place/bench thing. So I keep wondering if I'd be forgotten. Haha this thought hangs around at the back of my mind until I truly panic about my papers and can't care less.

as I feel my life slowly seeping away while waiting for my laptop (which I have affectionately named Stella) to restart twice today because Stella's mighty efficient these days, I start to think about how much of our time is spent on waiting. waiting for the bus, waiting for class, waiting for food, waiting FOR FRIEND, wait wait wait. my god so much time is wasted doing nothing but waiting. what does this tell us? don't wait? wait? huh what are you waiting for an answer?????

Staring at the photo long enough, I can almost feel the waves move and a slight sea breeze.

Freedom.



so right, i was just looking at facebook photos and someone (I don't even know who this person is and he/she's my friend, oh gosh) just uploaded photos of a holiday at Redang Island. OMGGGG I WANT TO GO ON A BEACH HOLIDAY LIKE NOWW. soft sand, blue skies, crystal clear waters, guitar playing softly, colourful (alcoholic) drinks with umbrellas in them. Not that real life isn't going well but I feel like I need to not care about the world, even just for one day. Remember how the cab driver in the movie Collateral has a photo just like this in his car so, according to him, he can escape whenever he feels like it. sighs maybe it's me recognising that the exams are coming soon and my defense mechanisms (denial, denial, denial) are not working so well. urgh whines.

Hello fellow Merlioners!

I finally found something I like about Singapore :)
I used to only know Electrico, and then for a long while just E.I.C.
Now my eyes, and ears, have been opened. I really think our music's pretty darn decent.













Oh! we were there!


The great great spy experiment.


And of course, my dear friend,


I do hate singaporeans' video taking skills though.
I sometimes think that 'alternative' bands are just people who can't seem to break into mainstream. I mean, with all the criticism about being too mainstream and common, don't you think its also erm, damn hard to write songs that EVERYONE will love? not the crappy shit like the Jonas Brothers give us these days but timeless hits like Celine Dion or something? some bands try so hard to be artsy and indirect and misunderstood and emo but really, what's wrong with mainstream?

And it was all....

see last night was all about doing new things in hall my third year ass has never done before. It was refreshing (oh, how they fight and wrestle) yet there was a subtle reminder that our time is coming to pass in here in this yellowyellow hall. Something Wanyu took note of when we were looking at bash photos and for the first time, the number of photos of c3 girls were like, 3. But of course, I refuse to leave without a mark.

there's something that's been brought up quite often recently. ANDROGYNY. some people hate being it. I say DON'T. Our dear psych tutors have mentioned more than once the advantages of being androgynous. They're more resilient, adventurous, assertive, confident, independent, adaptable, sociable, emotionally stable. They're the well-adjusted and well-equipped ones. this screams 'stop being such a girl lah!'



I will hold you till the pain goes away.

eenie meenie minee mo.

Is life only a matter of choice? Hmm I do believe in all that motivational stuff about how anything is possible and how when one door closes, another opens. We CAN choose to be affected by what event, and in what way. Take the depressed for example, life is morbid, sad and meaningless. I think they're just not looking hard enough at the good side of it. It's like this reading about this study we had for emotions tutorial. Individuals in collectivist or individualistic cultures feel the same emotions, they merely choose which to focus on, influenced by the type of culture they are in. Which brings up a problem about choice, we seem to be bounded by society or the situation to do things we don't really want to do. But isn't it also a choice whether or not to be bounded by societal rules? although i agree it does make choosing difficult. I mean, go ahead, break the law and kill the next person who annoys you, but the idea of consequence usually stops us. so freedom of choice is really no freedom at all? I'm not so sure. Of course the laws (written or unwritten) of society are not the only things which binds us. i think the most damaging feature of humans sometimes is our emotions. The intense ones blinds us and takes us so far off course so easily and without our realization it's scary. Hence bringing us back to the depression example.

see this is usually where all my life debates end- in confusion. I guess what I can conclude in overall is that: 1) we have a choice. 2) we don't see it. 3) we make horrible choices anyway.

....stupid humans.

and whoever said money is not important has too much of it and is morally obligated to give us some. no choice.